After 2020… It became very clear that 2021 did NOT understand the assignment!
All joking aside, what a whirlwind this year has been, here in New Zealand I have been overwhelmed with the changes that have been going on, and am pleased to say finally out of an almost 4 month lockdown period!
I know it hasn’t been easy on the rest of the world this year either, so my heart goes out to all of you. Your feelings are valid, and it is okay if you feel overwhelmed, exhausted or just want to hide until all of this is over… I see you, and just know, you’ve got this!
One of my favourite things to do at the end of the year (I have even set it for my clients as homework this year), is to write down your own 10 lessons of 2021!
It is so easy for us to see all of the ‘crap’ we have gone through as exactly that, but I invite you to get curious and see how life is serving and supporting you through all of this turmoil. I also invite you to write down all of your wins this year, big and small, because you are worth celebrating!
Remember… Whatever lessons you have learnt this year, meet them with love and grace, and know inevitably, they are all serving you and your highest good!
#1: HAVE FAITH
My word of the year this year was FAITH, and like the Universe loves to do… it truly put me in positions where my faith was tested! But, as I have also learnt, life is always happening for you.
When I say faith, it was learning to have faith in something greater than me. I have never grown up practicing a religion, nor do I believe there is a right or wrong way to practice faith.
So for me, it was learning to trust that I am truly supported in all that I do, and that no matter the ups and downs I am always held by a greater force. I refer to it as The Universe or Source, for others it might be God.
Whatever you decide to call it, the essence in my opinion remains the same and has been what has gotten me through one of the toughest years yet, and I am so truly grateful for the gift of this lesson, and will continue to have faith in myself, the support around me and the Universe as I navigate my future years.
#2: YOU ARE WORTHY SIMPLY BECAUSE YOU EXIST
I’m not going to lie, this one is still a work in progress, but man, did I have some breakthroughs this year!!
Knowing my core wound or story is that “I’m not enough”, I had never truly realised that the reason I keep myself to such a tight schedule, so busy and always filling up my days with to-do lists was to inevitably avoid feeling this not enoughness.
My worth for goodness knows how long, was attached to how much I was DO-ING, rather than being loved and worthy for simply BE-ING!
This blew my mind, and is still something I have to remind myself on the daily. That no matter my level of productivity, I am enough simply because I exist. No emails, content, coaching, etc could ever change that.
#3: GIVE YOURSELF PERMISSION… GUILT FREE!
Truly… this is something I have seen my clients struggle with so much this year and one of the things I have been thanked the most for; helping people give themselves permission.
Permission to eat the treat guilt free, to rest guilt free, to want more from themselves, bodies or lives… GUILT FREE!
I cannot tell you how long I struggled with the idea that the permission had to come from an external source – coach, partner, parent. And yet I hate the feeling of being controlled? Makes no sense right, yet here I was giving my power away day after day.
It wasn’t their fault, I just wasn’t clear enough in my boundaries internally, energetically and professionally. As soon as I gave myself permission to stop, not reply, or slow down… things dramatically shifted in my health and my happiness.
There is a difference between clear communication and being powerless!
#4: CELEBRATE MORE!
If there is ONE thing I wish women would do more… CELEBRATE THEMSELVES!! And no, I don’t mean go out and drink more wine (although if you want to, do it)!
I mean look back on your week, month, day OFTEN and see how much you have accomplished, not just physically… mentally, emotionally and spiritually!
We are so quick to support our friends, or sometimes we get a competitive streak and drop into comparison and that removes the feeling of celebrating other women, but this needs to SHIFT!!
You, your friends, your family, the strangers that we feel like we know on the internet, all need to be celebrated for the amazing things they are doing, no matter how big or small! Keep a list of your wins close by and add to it often to remind yourself of how amazing you are doing!
Forget cancel culture. Let’s create a celebrate culture! Where we lift each other up, help one another be seen, because DAMN! It not only feels good, but what you celebrate in others you also call forward in yourself!
#5: PRACTICE FORGIVENESS
It has been a year full of judgements, towards others, towards ourselves, making us question our decisions, our beliefs and where we stand on things, and if we are making the right choices.
The hardest thing when you judge yourself, is that you really can’t see clearly. If you are looking for answers, you just pull yourself down into a lower frequency when you are being judgemental.
It doesn’t matter if it is of others or yourself, it is a toxic practice, one that I am practicing letting go of.
Now the opposite of judgement is forgiveness. This doesn’t mean that you just let things slide and people or your mind walk all over you, but you can practice forgiveness, when you are ready to move into a state of acceptance. To remove the weight of beliefs that are holding you back and to free yourself from judgements you have made!
I have learnt this art form deeply in Alyssa Nobriga’s Institute for Coaching Mastery where I studied this year to get my life coaching certification… that is a whole other blog post though!
#6: IT IS OKAY TO FAIL
You remember me mentioning not feeling enough… Yup, well if I wasn’t productive and completing my daily to-do’s then I was a failure, and guess what, I attached that to being not enough too!
In my opinion, something is only really a failure when you stop trying, and this little trooper here NEVER GIVES UP!
Even when times are hard, there is always a way through, and just like when we were baby’s learning to walk, no matter how many times we fell down, we didn’t let that stop us from trying again.
Your failures don’t need to mean anything about you, the best thing you can do is take the lessons from them and see how they are actually working to support you; which ties perfectly into my next lesson…
#7: LIFE IS HAPPENING FOR YOU
To further the lesson of it being okay to fail…
Let me be real with you. I launched something this year and it was THE biggest flop that my business has ever seen. I took it so personally, made it mean so much about me, that I was a failure, no one wanted to work with me, etc…
But the truth was, I was burnt out, exhausted, in the middle of a lockdown and it was actually such a gift that my flop of an idea didn’t end up going ahead because my health would’ve deteriorated.
I have had so many failures in my life, and now I look back and see the lessons, and gifts they have all been. They have been the stepping stones that have supported me along the way.
Without these failures, I wouldn’t have reached the success as they were all valuable opportunities to learn. And whilst you may be in the middle of a lesson now, and it can be hard to see how this is supporting you, know that in time it will make itself clear.
This way we can stop being a victim to our external circumstances and start being the victor!
#8: DANCE LIKE NOONE IS WATCHING
I mean this both literally and figuratively! Dance naked in the bathroom mirror with your top songs of 2021 blasting out! HAVE SOME FREAKIN FUN!
I started back up at dance classes this year, and honestly, it was some of the most fun I have had in years. Being a free spirit, learning something new, being a kid all over again… sometimes getting frustrated for getting it wrong, but always ending up laughing at myself because no-one but me really cared!
But the lesson it truly taught me, was just to show up authentically as myself. Wrong or right dance moves, enjoy the moment, release the stuck energy, and clear your mind of all that is no longer serving you!
You will never get this moment back, make the most of it!
#9: PROTECT YOUR ENERGY
A question to ask yourself as you conclude this year… who or what is draining my energy?
Now I say that with kindness, because it may be hard to realise some of those close to you are actually energy vampires! The people that actually leave you feeling more exhausted than before you saw them.
Or maybe, you realise that some tasks or your work is just not what you want to be doing anymore. Or maybe it is just that you need to get clearer on your boundaries moving into 2022!
Your energy is your number one currency, you don’t want to be trading that freely with anyone or anything. It is important to be there for others, yes! But it is also important to take care of you! After all, you cannot give from an empty cup!
#10: LIVE IN A STATE OF GRATITUDE
Fear cannot exist when you are in a state of gratitude! (Read that again!)
After the last years we have had, it is understandable to be fearful about what is happening or what is going to happen in the future! The number one thing we can do to shift out of that fear is to practice gratitude.
Acknowledge your fears yes, but we don’t need to live in them or dwell on them, instead open your eyes and your mind to all the things around you that you have to be grateful for… the fact you can even read this blog is a gift in itself!
If you feel like your mindset needs a reset, practice gratitude every day, just write 3 things down or say them outloud and notice the internal shift it makes (even the science backs me up on this).
#11: ACTIONS SPEAK LOUDER THAN WORDS
As someone who LOVES hearing words, and speaks my mind and feelings so freely and deeply, I always trusted and listened when people spoke… took their words at face value.
Now I am not saying this is wrong, however I was leading myself blindly, not looking to see if their actions followed, and continued to get myself hurt. Whether this was in relationships or work, I was doing it to myself time and time again.
I also had to take a hard look in the mirror (the mirror of life) and see that I was guilty of doing the same. Often so unintentionally, but still… It helped me see things a lot more clearly and start taking more action that I had before!
So, I don’t issue this as a warning, but more of a reflection, see who in your life you might feel let down by and see if you can communicate that to remedy it if that is what you want, but also look at yourself and how you can improve to follow through with your actions. It helps build trust not only with others, but within yourself!
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I hope that there is something within these lessons that resonates with you, they come from my heart and are expressed with love, vulnerability and truth. I wish you every happiness in the years to come, and may 2022 hold every blessing you could imagine and more!
With love,
Sheree xo
Holistic Nutritionist, Personal Trainer & Wellness Coach I empower women like you to transform their lives, understand their bodies and feel their best from the inside out!